How do we, parents, raise each children to be model citizens? Stop conforming to what society expects from your child. Further more, lead by example. You are your child's only role model. Forget about how you were raised. I know it's easier said than done, but healing yourself from your past certainly does your parenting skills a bit of good.
Whether or not your family is run by a patriarch or a matriarch, it is important not to rule out the importance of respect and responsibility. Teaching your child to be responsible and respectful goes a long way. Most importantly, be patient with them. When raising more than one child becomes a burden, don't be afraid to ask the older ones to help you out. Spending time with them is also important. Regardless of how busy you are at work or at home, take the time to make an appointment with them. Allowing your children to be respectful and considerate of your free time is also important. We, parents, need some time to ourselves too. Having a healthy relationship with your spouse is also important. Meeting the needs of each other will demonstrate to your children that having a good marriage is possible. Divorce is not fun. Having your children understand that their existence is not the cause of the divorce is very crucial.
Having a good relationship with someone is challenging. It takes patience, respect and compromising to make it work. No one should be forced to stay in a marriage if there is abuse or blatant infidelity. I know some of you would think, "Why bother marrying someone if you know that person is a cheater?" First off, you wouldn't know. I am for long term friendship and intimacy before making a full time commitment of marriage. Heaven forbid if a child is conceived outside the marriage clause. Society loses their mind whenever a woman gets pregnant outside of marriage.
As a family, regardless how bad things get, should always help each other out. I never got help from my parents when I got pregnant before getting married. Abortion was not something I had in mind. Honestly, I loved my daughter's father. It was rather unfortunate he had become abusive during our time together. The divorce was harsh on everyone; including my daughter. I believe that a woman should have the choice for abortion; especially when they have been forced upon by oppressive men, who believe they have every right to a woman's body.
I can't blame any one parent for any men who believe that they are God's gift to women. Society has been filling every children's mind with an ideal. The ideology that men should behave a certain way and women another. Society doesn't care about the family; only what benefits them socially, economically and financially.
So, with that being said, what resources can we use to help ourselves to be better parents? Doing lots of research. Believe me, I read plenty of magazines, health articles and parenting blogs. It may be exhausting, but a little tip here and there from other parents can lift a lot of burden off your shoulders. Raising a child is not easy. I cannot imagine raising more than 6 children. Education and health resources become highly expensive.
I have every reason to believe that the capitalist society are raising prices of our education and our health benefits. To what extent, is beyond me. Even government programs like WIC and food stamps require proof of income. Your household cannot earn a certain amount of money to qualify for government housing. Honestly, how can a family get by financially with their means to support a new set of family? The problem is not with society. The problem is within the home.
If we cannot teach our children to be responsible and respectful to each other, what makes us think that society can do the same for our family? Why have we allowed society to take hold of our sanctuary? What is the purpose of my blog? I'm not here to condemn the family. I'm here to make the individual families aware that the foundation of their home has gone awry. The family is the central unity of our individuality. A place we call home. A community in which we are accepted individuals. A family filled with unconditional love, unwavering respect and mutual understanding.
If our children do not feel the security of a family, we failed as parents. Society will do whatever it takes to take hold of our home; especially the broken family. So, how do we act?
1. Let your children know you love them unconditionally
2. Harsh lessons are better at home than it is outside the home
3. Be kind to one another. All of you. If you can't respect each other, why would you expect your children to do the same?
4. Forgive each other; including yourself
5. Set boundaries. Even a child needs to know that mommy and daddy need time alone too.
6. Aspire your child's interest; even if they want to copy you, don't turn it down
7. Do not set expectations you know you can't fulfill yourself
8. Make every moment fun
9. Mistakes happen. Don't sweat it
10. Do the best you can with what you have. Be thankful always.
